I don't like success-oriented articles too much. All these "15 ways to achieve your goal" or "25 reasons that prevent you from being successful" are texts that simplify the perception of reality and reduce the goal of life to the idea of ​​material well-being.
But there are lists of thoughts and principles that help you quickly check life attitudes and draw conclusions, and do not interfere with our views to lead a happy life.

1. Search for excellence. In yourself, at work, in your beloved. The pursuit of the ideal is not the embodiment of the advertising slogan "you deserve the best" in your life, but an unobtrusive way to tell yourself that you are still not good enough to deserve a promotion, find a loving partner, or at least achieve your desired weight.

2. Narrowing horizons. "I'm a simple person", "I can't do it", "I never had any ability in sports / languages ​​/ choosing clothes" - this is a way to quickly surrender, fall before the shot. It hurts to grow above yourself, but it always brings results.

3. Concealment of real feelings and emotions. Being honest with yourself and having the courage to admit your fears, problems, doubts is just a manifestation of a strong character.



4. Waiting for good luck. In general, it would be nice to sit under some tree and wait for something good to happen. Here is the saying "Someday a truck with money will roll over on your street too" - a graphic illustration of this strategy. Luck is a pleasant thing, but even it happens only to those people who are preparing for it: they sort out opportunities and develop abilities.

5. Waiting for something. This is the level of advanced waiters. It is easy to calculate this feature in yourself by the phrase "I'm not ready for ...". Honestly, the right place, time and person may never happen in your life, because readiness comes in time only in cooking. Otherwise, readiness is a process, not a result.

6. Seek approval. It is good, of course, to have a reliable rear, when someone praises and supports. But often recognition comes after you show the result, for the attempt is rarely praised.

7. Trying to do everything alone. Even if you have the strength to pull on some life long-term construction on your own, then it is much better and faster to do it together: with a like-minded person, friend, partner or psychologist.

8. Empty promises. Before you tell yourself that you will do something (start running in the morning, go for an internship in a year, start reading 20 pages every day) - estimate the likelihood that you will do it regularly for at least a month on a 100-point scale. If you are not sure that you will invest the energy, then there is no need to engage in self-deception.



9. Reflections on your weaknesses. With experience, self-pity becomes a painfully pleasant sensation (yes, something inside tickles and shrinks when you think "oh, what an unlucky person I am, everything is wrong with me"). Try to pay as much attention to your strengths as you once spent on fixing on difficulties.

10. Blaming others. Since the time of Freud, each of us has a source of self-justification: parents, unsuccessful childhood, school are to blame for everything. In general, whoever you look at - everyone is injured and offended. From the moment you come of age, you are fully responsible for yourself and have the right to make any choice. Yes, it’s not very convenient to think so. But blaming others is, alas, a manifestation of cowardice before life.

11. Life in the past. Almost each of us had our own "golden age"- childhood, student life, first love. To tell the truth, then there were also difficulties, but you forgot about them. The best may be ahead, but for the sake of this it is time to remember the present.

12. Persistence of grudges. Check if the thought of someone's act six months after it still causes pain, then the resentment is still with you, even if you do not remember about it around the clock.

13. Avoiding change. Change of job, place of residence, views are stressful events. And then either it is worth accepting unconditionally what you have, or doing things.

14. Desire to make everyone feel good. There are no such decisions, after which everyone is comfortable. So think, is it possible that the only person who regularly loses because of your choices is yourself?



15. Diminishing yourself. "Yes, there is nothing special in me", "I am the same as everyone else", "there was nothing difficult in this matter" - this is not a manifestation of modesty, but a way to let others understand that you do not deserve respect.

16. Gossip and superficial conversations. On the one hand, evolutionary theory claims that man became man through gossip. Talking and knowing about others helped to know friends and rivals, kept the commune together. But on the other hand, we have already grown up and climbed down from the trees. Discuss ideas, plans and knowledge, not people - this will give more for development.

17. Desire to surrender. Failure is not to be wrong, but to stop making efforts in the future.

18. Communication with negative people. Of course, we all have hard times. But if someone from your environment is chronically sad, aggressive, depressed, then remember: negative emotions are contagious.

19. Comparing yourself to others. We're not just all different. We are all unequal. We have different genes, upbringing, a starting set of opportunities. Therefore, there is no more in common between you and someone else than between a cloud and a tree.

20. Confidence that you are not influencing anything. Here I will not crumble with common truths, but I will advise the film. Christmas is still far away, but there is one wonderful American film "It's a Wonderful Life" (1946), which says that even if you are the most ordinary person, if you were not there, it would be much worse around. The first hour and a half of a rather drawn-out plot is more than compensated for by the last half hour. Look for a colored version.